The reports of my death have been greatly exaggerated.

I'm back...

Much like that semi digested nachos bell grande you had for lunch climbing up from the trenches of stomach warfare, I have returned to the blog-a-sphere.  This is more to just keep me honest.  A real time record of my mistakes and successes.  A check and balance system to remind me that bike racing is important but at the same time keep it in its place.  So buckle up and get the barf bags handy because you never know when the cabin is going to depressurize.  And here we go:

So where am I?  I'm 33, a cat 3, and flying solo.  Over the three years since my last post I've become my greatest ally and my worse enemy several times over.  To succeed in this sport you have to do that.  But knowing when to be which...therein lies the key.  This past week was the "River Ride World Championship" as we affectionately call it.  That Saturday I was my worse enemy.  Often when we think of being a friend to ourselves we immediately think of "kindness" or "comfort."  Giving yourself luxuries because, well, "You deserve it."  Or at least that's what we tell ourselves.  But while that can be true in many cases it can be the opposite of true friendship.  A true friend will keep you honest.  A true friend will call you to the carpet.  A true friend will make you do the thing you need to do even when you don't want to.  I did none of those things.  Instead I let myself give up.  I talked myself out of pushing hard.  I came up with a million reasons on why it wasn't worth it or why I was going to fail.  I was cold, I was the slowest of those in the front group, I was the smallest, my back hurt, I was hungry, I was bonking.  The truth is none of that mattered.  Ninety percent of those things are de facto in any race I do including the river ride.  The difference is normally I just grit my teeth and pedal harder.  And when I do, even if I don't win I'm usually a hair's breadth from success.  That's not me beating my chest rather it's true of anyone who pushes themselves that hard.  But for whatever reason I just wasn't engaged.  Lesson learned, or should I say re-learned  Just like everything in life(things more important than pedaling a bike): if it's important to you, fight till your last breath.

So with that said the key word for the 2016 season is "compartmentalization."  Mainly the ability to keep life in it perspective place.  To not let failure and success bleed over.  Had a bad day at work...so what, you can have a good day on the bike.  Had a bad workout...so what, use it as fuel to do better tomorrow.  Had a good race...so what, you're not invincible.  Nothing in this world is the end of the world except the end of the world.  And I for one plan on living forever.

This post may be a bit dramatic, but mentally I'm lacing up my boots and getting ready for this next training block.  New bike and 2016 goodies should be arriving soon and I'll be doing an in depth review of "chinese carbon frames" which should be exciting.  Stay tooned.

From Velonews: "Quick Look: Dugast Small Bird tubulars to hit the market in limited quantities"

Since 1972, Dugast has been pushing the boundaries of tire design and in its history has come up with some of the legendary tires of cyclocross.

In the summer of 2003, the then 72-year-old André Dugast handed off his beloved brand to Richard Nieuwhuis and a fresh round of serious innovation ensued. Egg-shaped casings, sidewalls derived from lingerie fabrics, pink latex, the ill-fated Diavolo spiked tubular and the Pipisqualo tread design have all been part of Nieuwhuis’ incessant tinkering, but he may well have one-upped himself with the Small Bird.

We have yet to actually see them in the flesh and hopefully will ride a pair in the next few weeks, but for now a brief rundown and some until-now super-secret photos will to have to suffice.

First off, it’s important to point out that the Small Bird is almost exactly the same tread pattern as Dugast’s Fast Bird, the World Cup-winning mountain bike tubular, so it’s not like the tread pattern hasn’t proven itself. The tread blocks and configuration are very similar, but the size and scale of everything has been adapted to 32 and 33mm ’cross tires. The side knobs, although they are the trusty Rhino check-mark type, are slightly lower at 2.7mm and the center blocks are 1.5mm, which will make the tire roll fast in a straight line.

The Small Bird also pioneers some less-obvious improvements, some of which will carry over into the whole Dugast lineup.

First, the days of Aquaseal and Tent Sure are gone. Dugast is finally (and not a moment too soon) factory-sealing their legendary casings, which will add to the lifespan and durability of the tires with no loss of suppleness.

Second, dual-compound tread. No big deal, right? Wrong. This might well be the first ’cross tubular to incorporate a harder compound for the center track and softer, grippier rubber for the side knobs, adding to speed and performance.

So what does all this add up to? Stu Thorne from Cyclocrossworld.com told me that this tire is blazing fast, but still turns exceptionally well and allows more pedaling through corners. It is designed to be a good all-rounder particularly suited to fast, grassy courses and conditions ranging anywhere from dry to tacky, or even light mud or short muddy sections; for big mud, bust out the Rhinos.

The Small Bird has already proven its mettle since its introduction at the Tabor World Cup this year with wins in junior, under-23 and elite races, plus wins in SP Ruddervoorde and the European Championships. The Small Bird’s first bite of American soil will come this weekend in Louisville, Kentucky, at the U.S. Gran Prix of Cyclocross’s Derby City Cup.

Now, some good news and some bad news. The Small Bird will cost the same as the Rhino and will come in 32mm and 33mm diameters (that’s the good news), but availability will be limited until next year. There will be fewer than 100 tires coming into the U.S. for this season.

Dugast USA/Thorne Products is the sole importer of Dugast, so if you want any chance of getting your hands on these rare birds, you’d better call now. - Michael Robson - Velonews

Ride Empowered Criterium Training Series/Off-site meetings

I knew today was going to be one of those days as I had spent most of my morning and lunch telecommuting from my off-site “B” office.  Despite the name, the “B” office is rather close, it's across the hall from my main office in the area known as my bathroom, and consisted of me, sitting there with my ipad, cursing everything I've ingested in the last 48hrs including even small things like Altoids or water.  Yes, it was going to be one of those days.  So as most of the cat 5 team now knows, I'm absolutely horrible at warming up for races so I decided to ride the ten or so miles to the race.  I find myself riding there in this hot muggy air, blasting Elite Force's latest tunes, absolutely starving, shoving my face with powerbars the same way Charlie Sheen probably does with narcotics.  And despite all this I'm riding there at a speed that could be slightly misconstrued as a moving track stand.  It would have made the OJ Simpson thing look like a high-speed chase.  Needless to say, I was not feeling this.  I arrive at the venue and was relieved to see only a few people rolling around on carbon hoops.  I didn't realize people we're going to be tapering, peaking, and pulling out all the stops this race.  If I had know that I would have busted out the shiv with the drop bars.  Not the Specialized bike, an actual shiv.....I used to live in Brooklyn........it's how we do crits back there.  Ok, yeah maybe I'm just bitter because my carbon hoops are getting de-pringled, although next week I may break out the old Rev-X wheelset for laughs.  After the race I'll use them to dice up some lettuce, cucumbers and tomatoes for a nice post race salad.  After I reg and Trevor Johnston pokes me no less than SEVEN times while pinning on my number, in a stroke of genius I decide that the 45mins before my race would be the perfect time to adjust my left cleat that has been  giving me problem.  So I'm sitting there with my multi-tool very gleefully wrenching away happy that I will finally be able to pedal with both legs and then Chuck Hutcheson rolls up.  If you don't follow me or Chuck on strava, you may have missed a hilarious little back and forth that happened when I gave him crap for posting a 1 sec ride, we've all done that one before haven't we.  It culminated in me showing up to the Monday ride hoping not to get punched in the mouth, which I didn't but now I will probably get heckled by him for the rest of my life.  Chuck looks at me, then looks at my cleat and then back at me and exclaims “Really?!  Is right before a race really the best time to be doing that.”  In a perfect world I would have stated that riders in the pro-tour are always getting their cleats adjusted WHILE on their bikes in the middle of a race by the team mechanic.  But instead I just looked at the ground all dejected and said “no.”  Ah but here's the clincher, immediately after that CH noticed his seat wasn't straight and had to borrow my multi-tool to fix it right before a race.  That's what we call HECKLE KARMA.  And yes, my cleat is dialed now and it feels like I'm riding in bunny slippers not 6” stiletto heels............not that I know what that’s.......nevermind.  Meanwhile Trevor's tire decides to flat 2mins before the start.  And while this is going on, Craig explains to us that he is not racing and only there to watch and for demoralizing support.  This meant that instead of me having a 33% chance of having to work and a 66% chance of tail gunning it at the back while looking pretty, I now have a 100% chance of having to gut myself because Trevor is stronger and our best bet is for me to try to cover everything so he can save his strength. 

So my woefully unwarmed up butt lines up for the start and I do my usual drop my chain five seconds before the gun goes off get it back on and wipe the grease off turning my white socks grey routine.  And boom we are off, at the slowest pace ever.  Seriously we were doing a whopping 17mph at the first corner.  First two laps are chill and then chaos breaks out as the field gets shatter and split into multiple parts.  I don't know what happened.  I was close to the front for two laps then on the third I drifted back to take a breather, maybe smoke a cigarette and read the newspaper.  While I was attempting to warm up and stretch a break was formed.  This break was fast, fast to the point that half the breakaway riders DNFed and the remainder lapped the field(fast break, short course).  We ended up chasing for days.  I actually spent a fair amount of time on the front helping.  At one point I had just finished doing a pull on the up wind section and was drifting to the back to tuck back in when I feel a hand smack my butt and I hear our mentor for the race yell “Get you @$$ up there and take a pull.”  So begrudgingly I trodded back up to the front, took another pull, chicken winging the whole time trying to get someone to help form a decent paceline and give me a break.  The highlight of the race was about 20mins in.  Myself, a guy I can't remember, and another guy I can't remember in a Team City Lyons Jersey that I will now refer to as “The Lion of Carmichael” were up in the front on the finishing straight.  As we pass the finish line someone is blocking the lap card and all we can hear is  “Last Lap...one more to go.”  It was funny because as soon as we heard that the three of us looked at each other, at our garmins then back at each other and exclaimed "I thought this was a 45min race?!?!" So we immediately gunned it, strung the field out, we were countering each others moves, bounced it up to 30mph on the back straight.  I'm yelling at Trevor to latch on to my wheel for the sprint and he's looking at me with this look of pure “what the heckness.”  It was priceless.  So I put my head down, I'm sitting in second position I cut the corner hard fast (a few people mentioned they had no clue how I was going that fast through that corner............hehe course recon last week) while the Lyon of Carmichael goes wide and the third guy is slotted int the middle.  We have a gap on the pack and we just drag race it to the line, with me coming in third on the bunch sprint there.  We sat up, congratulated each other, watched the rest of the riders come by all tired and what not.  We thought they were cooling down. Then after about a lap. Chuck, our mentor for the race rolls, up and says "Are you guys done racing?" We reply that they had called last lap, we thought it was supposed to be 45mins but guess it was only 25 etc etc.  It was at that moment we all look to the left to see the pack way in the distance just drilling it.  Our hearts sink like when you see your recent ex dating your best friend.  We drilled it for laps trying to catching up to them, but to no avail.  Chuck even tries to tow me back up and I am just shot to pieces.  I'm pretty sure the whole time inside he was saying “suuucccckkkkker.”  I probably had the strength to make it up there, but just not the motivation.  In the end we ended up taking a free lap and they let us rejoin the group.  The last half of the race was pretty much a few of us just taking pulls.  I was feeling stronger and faster as the race went on.  Between Trevor and I, we made sure that if anyone attacked a Rio was near by.  Did a pretty good job of making the race hard-esque (I don't believe they allow me to use the term hard in referring to a cat 5 race).  And it ended exactly like it had twenty minutes earlier with a few of us gapping off the front on the final corner and sprinting again and me getting third in the bunch, Trevor got first putting him at 5th and me at 7th.  Awesome kudos to Trevor aka T-Pain for his massive attacks.

Huge thanks going to Heather for putting on this race series and all the volunteers that were out there yesterday!

*I realize I am now the mystical cornering fairy of doom.  If you are in front of me on the final corner, you will scrap you pedal.  Loss count how many times I saw this happen.

Old race report a buddy and soon to be quest writer emailed back to me,  I forgot I wrote this

It's one thing to go into something blind, it's another to go into something with your eyes wide open, and it's still yet another thing to go into something with your eyes wide open but looking the other way. Yesterday fell into the later category. It had been over 2 years since my last race. My training for the last few years could be tagged with such keywords as “sparse” “sporadic” and “hap-hazard.” And yet for some reason I found myself drawn back to racing, much like suburban America is drawn Starbucks. Addicting, like crack fiend addicting. I needed a hit. I needed a hit bad! And for that hit, I was going do a line of pure uncut cyclocross. You know, that good stuff you only hear rumors about. So I spent most of the morning mulling over to myself. Counting the strikes I have against me, remembering that the last ride I did was on a trainer a week ago. This should be interesting in the same way car accidents and train wreck are interesting. I know how this race is going to end up and yet I can't seem to turn away from the horrific tragedy that will happen know as Matt's Cyclocrss Implosion(copyright pending). And yet as transfixing as MCI would be, I was turning away from something, from all the things that said “don't do it!” Yes, I was going to race cyclocross, in definence of logic! Yeah take that Mr. Spock! Misery loves company as the saying goes, and this was no exception so I brought along my friend Jonathan. It was quite a contrast. Jonathan was on a full suspension specialized FSR. He wore thermal bottoms he got from walmart with his shorts over them, and to keep his hands warm he brought his work gloves. Then there was me, on a carbon Cannondale Taurine Single Speed, with XTR wheels and etc etc etc. Kitted up to the nines, with a matching jacket and hat, brought three pairs of gloves, just in case I decided to switch. I weighted a 130lbs this morning, and that was a problem. As Dez Wilder(Cannondale Facotry Team) always tells me "physically you look like you're at your peak all the time even when you're not riding. So no one takes you seriously when you tell them how slow you are." Oh but if only they knew the truth. The contrast between Jonathan and I was a bit embarrassing. ...for me. Here I was a on Gucci looking bike with probably the best looking team kit out there(Thanks Ron) and I'm lining up for the Men's C race. I was a strong reality check that I need to do more time riding and less time looking pretty. So Jonathan and I set out for a few practice laps. They went really smooth despite the mud. And not just mud, its like cake batter mud. Like Martha Stewart after her time in prison goes Bat-Crap and decides to get the last laugh by making the world's largest cake and uses the Folsom Rodeo venue as the mixing bowl. So after getting a few laps in I'm feeling pretty good and definitely happy I left my cross bike and brought my mountain bike. So after a little chill time its time to line up. I'm on the far left and Jonathan is in the middle. I hear “GGGGGGG” and I don't even wait for the “OOOOO.” I'm clipping in and mashing the pedals like a 10 year-old mashing X-box buttons after four cans of red-bull. Yeah not pretty but it was getting the job done. A rider shoots out in front and I pull in right behind him in the number two spot, exactly where I want to be, I turn around and we have a pretty good lead before rounding the 180 turn near the parking lot. Jonathan catches up to us and as we turn onto the straight thats goes back towards the start finish line tell him “Go for it! I got one gear and I'm going mach looney and a half. You got gears, use em!” Jonathan clicks up two gears and rockets ahead into second position. We round the corner and I absolutely nail my dismounts. I nailed them to the point where I swear I heard a heavenly choir sing for every barrier I went over. As we do the cake batter slide into the stadium we run into the back of the men's 40+ and the Womens A's and B's run into us. And thats when I hear it. A very loud voice yelling, “come on guys go go!” It was Larissa from UC-Davis. For the next four laps it was kind of like riding with myself with the constant non-stop trash talking she was spewing at the guy right in front of her, which happened to be me. Every time I almost bobble or lose it I have a commenter giving a play by play. Every spare breath I could muster was spent not recovering but firing a verbal barrage back in response . Around lap four it hit me, a sharp side stitch that reminded me why the only time I run is when I here the phrase “You there! Drop it and freeze!". And, that when I do run, I blow up faster than a McDonald's in Afghanistan. So now I just floor it even harder since I'm already in pain both physically from my side and emotionally from my verbal assailant. I fly threw the start finish line and check the clock. I got time for one more lap. Time to let it all hang out, although the last time I did that it landed me in jail for something called public indecency which is ironic because I thought I looked pretty darn decent. I cook through the paved section carrying speed in buckets and a backpack and click up two gears......oh wait, I'm on a single speed, darn it! I spin out my 32x16 and scream into the stadium followed by a sonic boom, wait, no, that was just more screaming insults being flung at me much like a monkey does with poo. I jam up the stairs and as I hit the woods Larissa shoots past me. I scream “OH HECK NO!” We drop into the woods and right as we exit I'm sitting tucked close in about to cut on the inside for the pass when it happens. WHAM! I'm on the ground, face in the mud, with my bike in the air. No clue what happened, how it happened, but I am asking WHY! Why god did it have to happen? I get up and hop back on my bike. Scott Clark comes shooting by and tells me to latch on. I latch on to Scott, patron saint of saving my butt as this isn't the first time his good graces have helped me. We both roll through to the finish line, and I'm spent like a dollar in kids pocket at a candy store. Boom, gone, over. After getting back to the pit I find that my semi-slick tires have transformed into obnoxiously slick tires. Thus my fall. In making the giant cake, Martha Stewart made a butt-load of frosting. I must have rode thought this because my tires looked and rode like glazed donuts. Now cops have two reasons to chase me, I'm a black guy...with glazed donut tires. But needless to say cross was fun. I got third in my class, Jonathan got second. I think with gears I could do a lot better. I was a little frustrating because the whole race I felt so under geared. But it happens. Big thanks for Jonathan for letting me wail on him when we ride mountain bikes. Scott Clark for harassing me ever time he saw me outside taking the trash out or washing my car. Telling me to do cross. And thanks to all the Rio Strada Teammates that keep the fun in racing and riding. Whether its a group ride, a wave as you pass in the opposite direction, or the hilarious email banter.

Robbie & Glen Alden Road Bike Time Trial Competitors: 2012 Race Bike now completed

Robbie & Glen Alden Road Bike Time Trial Competitors: 2012 Race Bike now completed: This is the updated 2011 Trek Speed Concept Time Trial Machine. Many updated were made to this bike over the winter. A list of updates are...

And the Cereal Guy award goes to........

Lance Armstrong for schooling every pro triathlete that laughed, scoffed, or mocked the idea of him racing in the Pro field.  

SRAM Red Hydraulic Disc and Rim Brakes Reveled

 

Contador banned two years

As a result his 2010 Tour and 2011-12 results have been stripped.

.....like we didn't know this would happen.

Feds drop Armstrong investigation, USADA continues inquiry

The Associated Press reported Friday afternoon that federal prosecutors have closed the investigation of seven-time Tour de France champion Lance Armstrong without filing charges. The investigation, headed by federal agent Jeff Novitzky, focused on alleged performance enhancing drug use by Armstrong and his former U.S. Postal Service teammates in the late 1990’s and early 2000’s.

According to AP, United States Attorney André Birotte Jr. said in a press release that his office was closing the investigation, but did not disclose the reason. more from Velonews...

If your bike doesn't look like this

................you are failing at looking Pro

SLAM THAT STEM

http://slamthatstem.com/page/12

For the love of a jersey...

Amazing Ritte Van Vlaanderen Bikes Born From Irreverence | Playbook | Wired.com

I needed a new laptop bag.

I wanted one that was waterproof, dust proof, bike friendly, stylish and CHEAP!  Remember I still have to buy my seasons supply of white bar tape so I can stay looking pro.  Anyways, I found this bag that you may also like.

Cannondale Notebook Bag

Carrying your laptop on your bike can be risky, with all the potholes, curbs and unexpected rain storms lurking about, and let's not even mention pedestrians and motorists. Protect your precious cargo with this bike bag and worry no more...Ok, you still need to pay attention to the road, but at least your laptop will be safe. Multi-compartment notebook bag Molded EVA foam is waterproof, protective and insulating Fully-padded computer compartment Other compartments: main file, organizer panel Large padded, adjustable, detachable shoulder strap Expanded capacity: 1170 cubic inches (19.2L)

The best part is normally it's $169.99 but you can but hear for $27.99.  That's 84% off!
Cannondale Notebook Bag (Black, One Size)

Seriously?! $3000 wheels?!

SRAM RED 2012 or is it 2013?

So Sram is at it again. After what seemed like a mass exodus of sponsored teams, Sram seems to be trying to wrestle a strangle hold onto the components industry.........again. Third times the.......

So what does that mean for you? Yes lighter and more expensive. Ok let's be real. The only major difference worth mentioning is the new "YAW" feature on the front derailleur. What does this mean? The back half of the derailleur moves more than the front.

In theory this is a good thing. But it seems like an disaster waiting to happen if you even think about cross chaining. I can see it now. You're off the front on the one race you do a year and as you hit the climb you start dumping gears while staying in your 53. BOOM GOES THE CAGE OF YOUR UBEREXPENSIVE DERAILLEUR. Why, because the chain is all the way to the left and the designers thought it would be awesome to make it lean to the right. Hey, it could happen.......

Leave your thoughts and comments on Sram Red 2013

And here we go

I'm just like you. I love bikes. In my imagination I'm a pro. I do get a fair amount of free stuff like a pro. I dress like a pro. My non-cyclist friends think I'm pro. I even hang out with pros. But let's be real, just like you...I'm not a true pro. Instead, I have a real job. I'm a construction consultant, and it takes me across the US, often without my bike. My training schedule goes from 20-35 hours on the bike to zero and back up again several times over. But that doesn't stop me from trying to be pro...

I'm just like you and you're just like me. We try to be pro. We try as hard as we can. We have a whole fleet of stupid expensive bikes. We eat pasta, tofu, veggies, burlap etc etc. We try to have that hip always on the go vibe going on. And we love....we love our espresso.

So this site is an anthem to us. The wanna-bes. The guys that are killing it on the group rides and only racing three times a year! The guys looking on ebay for the latest and greatest, the lightest and fastest, the blingiest and yet cheapest.

Come with me on my journey. I'll show you where I get deals, how i buy and sell things, what's the latest in nutrition, how to train, how I train, how I don't train hahaha, how to live the psudeo life style of a pro. There will be gear reviews, insane deals for your benefit, and of course..........of course lots of leaks and teaser.

Enjoy